Jo Sivyer

Jo Sivyer

After 30 years of a monogamous relationship I am navigating the complexities of a new friendship. There have been communication difficulties so I am seeking to understand myself better and the other person. The most valuable concepts I have learned are Fundamental Attribution Error and Confirmation bias and how confirmation bias can poison a relationship. I have learned to stay in the green brain and life is so much better. A very valuable course still work to do with the toolset. Thank you Esther.

Mar 24, 2025

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Ingo

The material was good but no different from what Esther has been publishing for years on YouTube. Also, I had expected a bit more production beyond "Esther talking monologues into the camera from a sofa". I consider paying 80 USD for the course as a tribute to her work, sort of like I would on Patreon. But for the product "course" itself it's overpriced.

Jan 31, 2025

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Noor T

These courses are MASTERCLASSES on how we engage with desire in our lives. This is THE WORK. They are not the easiest to move through -- and that is GREAT. You feel yourself growing and changing as you move through each chapter. Esther goes deep, it feels like therapy sessions with the best. Always grateful for her wisdom.

Jan 17, 2025

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Vanessa

J'ai beaucoup aimé ce cours. J'ai apprécié la longueur, c'était facile de rester engagé. C'était très clair et concis. Originalement, je me suis inscrite, car je trouvais que je n'étais pas toujours douée pour les conflits et je sentais le besoin d'acquérir des ressources. Ce cours m'a permis d'en apprendra davantage (styles de conflits, dimensions cachées, stratégies pour désarmorcer les conflits, etc.). Ce sont des éléments que je peux appliquer dans ma vie de tous les jours. Je pense que ce cours va me permettre de mieux analyser les conflits et d'essayer, le plus possible, de mieux y répondre. [ English translation: I really liked this course. I enjoyed the length, it was easy to stay engaged. It was very clear and concise. I originally signed up because I found that I wasn't always good with conflict and I felt the need to acquire resources. This course allowed me to learn more (conflict styles, hidden dimensions, strategies for defusing conflicts, etc.). These are elements that I can apply in my everyday life. I think this course will allow me to better analyze conflicts and try, as much as possible, to respond better to them.] 


Jan 4, 2025

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Jose I.

I remember saying to myself: If someone can help me make a positive change in my relationship, it would be Esther. While booking an appointment with her would’ve been the best, I chose to give her course a try and I’m glad I did. This course has shown me what constructive conflict can look like. It’s not that we shouldn’t fight but that the intention we infuse into fighting can make all the difference. I was reminded that it takes two to tango and that even though my partner chose not to do the course with me, I could still come up with brand new moves on my own. It just requires awareness and the right language to name things and eventually own them. Our conflicts are still messy and can unexpectedly go from 0 to 100 but the skills I’ve gained are making a difference! I don’t kitchen sink anymore nor do I hyper focus on details. I’ve managed to tame some of my implosive tendencies and hold on to less negative energy after a fight. I also now clearly see how my minimizing was triggering retaliation in my partner. So, is it perfect now? Far from it. I wasn’t expecting a quick fix out of this course but the tools I’ve gained are invaluable and I’m sure they’ll help me deepen my relationships, not only with my partner but with everyone else I share life with. While I take so many things with me after completing this course, the most impactful is to practice being aware of the fundamental attribution error which is when we unfairly think of our failings as circumstantial but our partner’s as their nature. Thank you Esther!

Dec 23, 2024

Cynthia

Cynthia

After thousands of euros spent on therapy and our breakup, I bought Esther’s course. I’m a fan for over 10 years now and I thought it wouldn’t hurt. We did the workbook each on our own. Weekly we came together to evaluate each other’s next chapter. In the beginning such an evening immediately turned into an argument, because that were the dynamics for years. But because of listening to each others work, hearing the deeper truth, feelings en self reflection on one’s own behavior, the dynamics changed. And after each chapter evaluation we talked for hours and hours in a constructive way. My husband never did anything active to emotionally grow before, but now he did. And I discovered my blind spots. We went back to living together and, with some ups and downs, we grew a lot this year together and are very happy again!

Dec 21, 2024

Gerwine Wuring

Gerwine Wuring

I want to be still more at ease and happy in my lifelong relationship with my partner, already over 50 years now. Since 5 years we are retired and are in a new circumstance that we life in a community since then, where we both experience completely different things and quarrel about it a lot. I got from the course that it is more complicated now, because of this triangel I am in with my partner. I have to unravel what belongs to our relationship and what is about (my communication in) the community I realised that this situation made me quite fulnerable and unsure. Just to realise that the main conflict is an inner-conflict in my self!!! Just to reflect on and mention in my conversation with my partner on which part of the triangel I am working will already help me and us and is a great deal to be aware of the coming weeks.

Dec 8, 2024

Chantelle N.

Chantelle N.

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I bought the course to understand how to navigate conflict, since I’ve been avoiding it my whole life. I learned how to take responsibility for my part without blaming anyone and say how stuff makes me feel. But think this will change my whole life for the better because yin-yang completes the puzzle.

Nov 29, 2024

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ian gabriel

1- self doubt, lack of confidence is what brought me ; 2- I learn so much, including, the underlying prism of power, trust & respect, the stance - stance choregraphy, as well as moving away from guilt and shame to responsibility and accountability ; 3- what i try to change is to grow the diffuser in me more jokingly ; I thank you enough for the course from the most profound part of myself- i look forward to more of your content

Oct 9, 2024

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Althea

We really loved this course! It gently guided us through several conversations that we truly needed to have. Esther provided context and language and common patterns, reminding us with every example how normal and universal it is for people to struggle with getting to productive conflict. We were both conflict avoidant coming into this, and now we know how important and supportive healthy conflicts can be! This course opened up a new venue for building trust and security in our relationship. Thank you for your tremendously powerful work, Esther!

Oct 7, 2024

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mehmet can

Great course, it is like a breath of fresh air when Esther talks about the experiences that almost all couples go through. Highly recommend to every couple in every phase of their relationships.

Sep 24, 2024

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Waheeda S.

I happen to come across Esther Perel during covid, amazed at her perspective and creative approach to the subject of relationships, I got hooked to her sessions. I am an islamic counselor from India , and I use her wisdom and gentle charismatic ways in my counseling sessions. I wish her all the success. Thanks🌹

Sep 3, 2024

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Catalina

I've been following Esther for years and have seen her speak at psychology conferences, always in a clear, direct manner, with the perfect blend of wisdom and a touch of humour. This course does not disappoint. In this fast-paced, automatic world where everything is immediate, desire and eroticism have a different rhythm. Connecting with oneself is fundamental to connecting with another, without rush, immediacy, and certainly not on autopilot. This course mande me reflect and look at desire through a different lens, a trip inside oneself and an invitation to use our imagination and bring our senses back to life. Each video is excellent, and the way the content is translated into concrete exercises is very valuable. The workbook is particularly helpful as it provides a summary of what Esther talks about, making it easy to follow the instructions. You can always re watch the videos if you missed something or clarify what you learned. I take away many learnings, but the one that has resonated with me the most is about reconnecting with my senses, imagination and the playfulness and being opened and willing to see what happens when we stay 3 minutes more instead of shutting down. Thank you Esther Perel and her team, your work helps so many and what a wonderful gift to be able to take these courses and learn from you.

Jul 15, 2024

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Charlene

This course allowed me to take down barriers, Esther allows you to see that your sexual relationship, and your relationship to sex are just a product of who you are - thus allowing you to choose what you actually want. Through a well crafted content, this course has helped me untangle some misunderstandings I had accumulated. It's allowed me to reconnect with myself to feel empowered, but also in my relationship to open up doors, that were actually not shut, but that I didn't even know could exist.

Jul 17, 2024

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Molly A.

We were super embarrassed and hesitant to give this a whirl at first- but this course gave my husband and I the script and vocabulary that we really needed to get through the scary parts of talking about sex and intimacy together. The workbook exercises were really thoughtful and practical! As someone who hasn't loved talk therapy in the past, this was a great alternative. Would do the course over and over again for years to come just to keep the conversation pathways open with my partner as we grow and change together in our marriage!

Jul 18, 2024

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Aaron and Laura

Aaron and Laura

Bringing Desire Back helped provide us the framework to facilitate a much-needed, ongoing conversation around our issues and hangups, as well as the validation that those issues and hangups are NORMAL. The course was not an overnight fix obviously, and I'm glad we didn't rush through it. There were some tears, dare I say a breakthrough or two, and definitely progress. One small thing that is changing for us because of this course is the diminishment of shame and awkwardness around sex, and that's not a small thing after all. What more could we ask. Thank you Esther, feeling grateful.

Jul 19, 2024

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Giacomo

I came to this course having followed Ester's work for some years. I was excited to have a platform and structure with which to embark on a journey of learning and discovery with my partner and the course gave me that and more. I'm so excited to take the course and all I learned into my relationship and see where the journey takes us!

Jul 19, 2024

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Catalina

This is a course for anyone looking to connect with the more playful, creative, and imaginative side and use this to understand and explore their own sexuality (with or without a partner) and all other areas of life. Its combines the reflective with the practical, and all the information provided by Esther in such a careful, metaphorical, hypnotic, and inviting manner, and beautifully crafted. I have learned a lot about myself and my way of being in sexuality, and how the emotional history woven since childhood plays such a fundamental role in how one gives and receives, and allows oneself to give and receive. I will keep each exercise and lesson to continue reflecting and challenging myself to enjoy the journey at deeper and clearer levels for myself and my partner. Thank you for sharing this knowledge, and for helping us pause, reflect, and connect with what is important.

Jul 19, 2024

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Amos

In my eight year relationship with my husband we have continued to navigate the impacts of the pandemic, career growth and loss, moving and adoption on our desire. This course made me feel grounded in my ability to reach across the divide and provided tools and framework to hold steady as we rock our way through the sometimes stormy seas of arousal.

Jul 22, 2024

JoAnne Silver Jones

JoAnne Silver Jones

I was asked to be an early reviewer for this course. I learned that sex, our sexual experience, is not a singular event, arriving, lingering for some period of time and then over. Our sexual life is always with us, via thoughts, smells, dreams, imagination, touch, sights and other senses. What has changed for me is increased awareness of the notion of the erotic. It is a liberating and expansive notion allowing all manner of pleasures into my daily life. I found this course, with its' focus on enhanced communication and deepening self-awareness, incredibly valuable as a 77 year old women, happily married to my wife for 32 years and knowledgeable about interpersonal communication. It is a rare combination of experiential learning and profound wisdom.

Aug 3, 2024

Liz

Liz

I've admired Esther Perel's work since discovering her a few years ago, so when I was facing conflict gridlock in my relationship with my partner and saw this course, I knew a $99 investment wasn't even a question. The course delivered! We both watched the videos and discussed the content together. The workbook was very helpful too. The fact that we can rewatch the content as many times as is necessary, really is the icing on the cake. Esther gives not only keen insight as to why our conflict is repetitive and "not very creative," but most importantly, she offers concrete tools to change the patterns all of us fall into. Especially enlightening were what lies behind the fights we have, and how they aren't really what we think we're fighting about. I feel empowered to make real change, and in this era of distraction and low attention spans, the efficient use of time in the materials is invaluable. I will be using humor much more than in the past, and I also plan to choose my battles much more carefully, be more curious instead of reactive, and have more compassion for my partner.

Jun 5, 2024

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Doro Ellerbrake

Doro Ellerbrake

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I am a couples counselor in Germany and I have been inspired by Esther's work for a long time. It brings such incredible value to listen to her podcasts, Ted Talks, youtube videos and all the other great formats she is offering. I used the "turning conflict into connection" seminar as a training for my work and of course I do use it for getting better in the relationship with my husband ;-) It is an excellent development that psychotherapists share lots of their wisdom to the public these days (in my perception Esther was one of the first who did!) thus making relationships in general a little bit better. I came across the "hidden dimensions" various times in Esther's work but in this seminar it became so much clearer with all the good examples. Also the chapter of "good apologies" is so helpful. Sometimes I wished I had known as much as I do now about relationships a few decades ago (I am 56 yo, working as a couples counselor since 2017). But the good news is that my job in HR for 15 years, my two adult kids and my 25-years marriage are a brilliant resource for what I am doing ;-)

Feb 15, 2024

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Alison

I learnt about Ester thru a podcast, not hers. Husband and I learnt about our different conflict styles and we love the term Low intensity warefare, we remind each other it when we find ourselves in a bickering place. Overall we found the course easy to follow, informative and helpful.

Feb 11, 2024

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Tiffany Martin

I have an avoidant relationship with conflict. I love Esther Perel’s work and have both listened to her podcast and read her books. I felt that this course may give me insight into building a healthy relationship with conflict itself. I learned some of the main drives behind conflict. I learned strategies on how to deescalate situations. I learned to be an observer and identify the cyclical roles that define conflict within different relationships. I would like to amend how I show up by recognizing when it is a good time to take a step back and commit to talking later. I think I have chosen to stay in the conflict to prove my dedication, but a well placed détente can make the conversation more effective and keep it from spiraling into something it doesn’t need to be.

Feb 2, 2024

Erin S.

Erin S.

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As a certified life coach with a niche in High Conflict divorce, coparenting, special needs parenting, and female empowerment plus my own lived experience with DV, it’s important to me to continue to heal and grow myself first and foremost so I can walk along others as they journey towards self love, security, and whole hearted living. The three underlying causes of conflict were taught so simply yet made a profound difference in the way I view conflict. As a person who takes flight and “stonewalls”, I now have more evolved language to explain “ I am overwhelmed, feeling attacked, and need an hour to process the information shared then respond in a way that’s protective of the relationship”. I care deeply and shut down so I don’t escalate the situation, not because I don’t care. Thank you for your heart of gold, Esther, and the work you do to heal the world one relationship at a time. 

Jan 31, 2024

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Kira L.

Over the years, I recognized that I had a knack for finding and dating addicts. In that, I became a different person. Evolving to present me: I realized that throughout the manipulation (on both sides), hurt and general survival in those tough years, I had learned several not-so-great methods of navigating emotions at a time of conflict. Through this course, I've learned that I am a Grade A-retaliator. Back then and even now, I feel justified to treat my partner the way that I feel. I understand it is not right and continue to learn every day. In this course, I hope to implement a reflection before I become reactive, taking accountability of my behalf impacts.

Oct 13, 2023

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Allison

I have been struggling with my partner for years. Thank you for giving us the vocabulary of the fighting strategies. It has changed the conversations. You have been a resource through a hard time. I especially appreciate the convenience of the downloads and the flexibility of being about to progress through it at our own discretion. You are wonderful, thank you!

Jan 16, 2024

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Amanda Ripley

Amanda Ripley

As a longtime fan of Esther, I wanted to go to the next level--to learn, not just listen. The workbook was extremely helpful as a tool to accompany the videos. The section on identifying the "hidden emotions" in conflict was invaluable! I was particularly struck by the realization that we are more likely to apologize to our partner than to show appreciation for them. That was an aha moment for me! I hope to use all of these lessons in my work as a journalist covering conflict--and in my own life. Thank you to Esther and her team for continuing to find new ways to help us make sense of ourselves and each other!

Jan 22, 2024

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Joanie

Amazing course , easy and short ! We keep thing simple ! Love it ! Thank you for this !

Jan 21, 2024

Chandrika Iyer

Chandrika Iyer

I needed some guidance to help couples during parenting sessions. I found that the child was not the problem but they were! and I needed some pointers to steer them towards resolving their issues.

Dec 18, 2023

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Pamela Romero Wilson

Hello Esther, I must confess that each time I have a strong fight with my partner, I leave that space to try to understand better what is happening with your content. Either podcast, courses or website. I find peace listening to you, i quit blaming and star understanding where is my power, my freedom by choosing how to react, my neglect to really see what he's really feeling, and that special frame where we can de-escalate a fight. I'm learning to recognize it by connecting with myself. Thank yo so much for organizing such valuable content and for keep on working to amplify your experience. Thank you from the heart.

Nov 8, 2023

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Amanda Willis

I’ve listened to Esther’s podcast and I trust what she has to say. Even in the first module I found painful realizations that will inevitably lead to better communication, conflict resolution, and relational repair in the future. I only hope more people will take interest and engage with the opportunity to grow.

Oct 28, 2023

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KK Harvey

A recent break up that ended after an argument brought me into your course. I wanted to see why the same arguments were coming up and try to see what my role and responsibility were in these arguments. The course opened my eyes to my fighting style, insecurities and reasons that we were repeating the same argument. I was fighting rather than expressing what I was FEELING. I feel that I have a much better handle on how to diffuse or at least take a break before reacting and how to express what I am feeling rather than attacking. Thank you so much for an excellent course.

Oct 28, 2023

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M.McSweeney

Becoming better at addressing conflict in positive ways at home and at work is an ongoing goal. Learning to use the "space" between the trigger and the response as something each person can control was one of the concepts that caught my attention. Remembering we are free to change how we respond to conflict was a great reminder!

Oct 27, 2023

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Ana

I took the course after a possibly relationship ending fight where I realized my partner and I seemed to never speak the same language. I learned so much from this course including that fights are never really about what you're fighting for in the moment! We've been trapped in a hopeless cycle of fights because neither of us ever dared ask the other directly for what we wanted or needed from them. The result was years of accumulated frustration, resentment, contempt, loneliness, etc. It may be too late to save my current/past relationship-- there only time will tell-- but the lessons from this course will serve me in EVERY relationship in my life now and moving forward. I can at least work on cleaning up my side of the street. Thank you, Esther, for all that you do. Keep them coming :)

Oct 27, 2023

Brenda Hixon

Brenda Hixon

I feel as humans we are so often eager to prove we are right, we fail to see the other individuals point or even acknowledge their feelings. After this course I know that I always need to take accountability for my part be it right or wrong.

Oct 22, 2023

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Donna Griva

The course appealed to me because conflict, for me, especially in my marriage, is often a way one street that leads to nowhere. Hearing the "broken record" over and over, wondering why are we here again and why can we not resolve this is frustrating, lonely and at times hopeless. Esther brings her deep understanding of relationships and human nature along with her passion and warmth to really dig down past the repeated patterns and open up a more holistic view of why we fight, why conflict plays out with the same responses over and over again and how we can break the cycle. I am glad that I took some quiet time to complete the workbook as it helped me to integrate Esther's teachings on a more personal level and allowed me to open up mine and my partner's patterns of conflict. For me, if I can see one thing that will change in my personal relationship since completing the course, it is to step back and observe with kindness my partner's responses and relax my defensiveness. This course brings a rich and sophisticated intelligence to love and relationships.

Oct 5, 2023

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Lisa Weinreich

I came to this course to improve how I communicate with my husband and closed loved ones. This course has given me useful tools which I've already started to utilize in my daily life! I'm striving to be more curious, reflective and less reactionary and triggered openly. Thank you, Esther!

Oct 12, 2023

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Natti

As always, mind blown! I finished all sessions in one day. I could not stop. And then talked to my partner about it until 4 AM. we did the work sheet together. We were able to expand our vocabulary when it comes to conflict and that gave us so much power. To know what you were feeling and then to accurately label it and then to articulate it confidently to your partner, while in conflict…. I feel is real communication and connection. Thank you Esther for the knowledge!

Oct 5, 2023

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Marion Talmo

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Conflict is a part of life that I would love to be better at. Conflict and confrontation turned into connection, honestly, sounds like a dream come true. I will always jump on an opportunity to connect with the people I love better and I know I can do a better job especially around conflict. I valued putting words to the underlying reasons for an argument; power, trust, value. It is helpful for me to have simplifying words to think through how I am feeling or how my partner may be feeling. "Explaining yourself through your impact not your intention" - My partner and I often get into cycles of trying over and over to explain our way through our intention when the impact is the more important aspect. This was an important piece for me to hear. The module on deescalating is also so helpful.

Oct 12, 2023

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Chris

Wow! What a course. Concise, educational and I had to laugh a few times. Bringing context and light and fun to the topic of conflict. Feeling rather conflict avoidant, I wanted to take the course to get further insights into the dynamics of conflict and how to navigate it better and feeling with more grounding. What stood out to me the most were the 3 hidden dimensions of power, trust and value that cause conflicts, how to identify them and then look to reconcile, as well as the analogy of river, kettle or bird when it comes to conflict resolution. Lots of prompts and examples of how conflicts can go, the different dynamics is what made this course very approachable and I could identify myself in different scenarios while also learning vocabulary or prompts to use at my conflicts to come. Thank you so much. I'm looking forward to practicing.

Oct 5, 2023

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Mariah Laughlin

I thought that in my relationship my partner and I were fairly good about how we argued... but this course has given me so much more insight not only into myself but also into my partner and how they perceive conflict. It's helped me understand my partner and where they are coming from, and helped us develop strategies to actually learn from the conflict and turn it into something productive. This course can even extend into how we communicate in conflict with friends, family, coworkers, etc.

Oct 11, 2023

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Bethan Thomas

A great launch pad from which to consider your style of fighting, understand what you’re really fighting about, and how to make meaningful apologies and effective repairs. Esther’s energy, creativity and ability to to build containment and give context for something so messy as conflict was steadying, reassuring and gave me hope that I can learn how to fight better. My only complaint is that I would have loved more examples of how to identify what you’re really fighting about and more examples of how to map your fights. I loved the content and hope there will be more to come on this topic. Thank goodness for Esther Perel!

Oct 11, 2023

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Toni Dolce

After initially discovering Esther Perel through her books, I have followed her work on social media, her podcast, bought her game (my friends call it "The Feelings Game"), and most recently was interested in taking her course on Turning Conflict Into Connection. I was hoping to gain some new knowledge about how to be a little lighter with the fighter in me and to learn a few tools on how to minimize and resolve conflict. A great example that I used recently was to lay on the floor - as mammals we cannot fight with our backs on the ground. This helped me regulate and allowed me to breathe and then laugh about why I was on the floor- thus turning an elevated situation into a more grounded and connected conversation. One thing that I will use moving forward is the phrase, "Let me tell you how I came to this reaction" in order to explain my place/feelings - instead of trying to blame or feel more powerful. Truly taking ownership. Thank you to Esther Perel and her team. Your work matters more than ever!

Oct 9, 2023

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Rens

Esther Perel's course on conflict resolution in relationships has completely changed my perspective on arguments. Her valuable insights and practical tips have helped me handle conflicts responsibly. I appreciate the focus on understanding and growth rather than avoidance. In summary, it's a valuable investment in my personal growth and relationship. Highly recommended

Oct 9, 2023

Jo Sivyer

Jo Sivyer

After 30 years of a monogamous relationship I am navigating the complexities of a new friendship. There have been communication difficulties so I am seeking to understand myself better and the other person. The most valuable concepts I have learned are Fundamental Attribution Error and Confirmation bias and how confirmation bias can poison a relationship. I have learned to stay in the green brain and life is so much better. A very valuable course still work to do with the toolset. Thank you Esther.

Mar 24, 2025

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Ingo

The material was good but no different from what Esther has been publishing for years on YouTube. Also, I had expected a bit more production beyond "Esther talking monologues into the camera from a sofa". I consider paying 80 USD for the course as a tribute to her work, sort of like I would on Patreon. But for the product "course" itself it's overpriced.

Jan 31, 2025

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Noor T

These courses are MASTERCLASSES on how we engage with desire in our lives. This is THE WORK. They are not the easiest to move through -- and that is GREAT. You feel yourself growing and changing as you move through each chapter. Esther goes deep, it feels like therapy sessions with the best. Always grateful for her wisdom.

Jan 17, 2025

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Vanessa

J'ai beaucoup aimé ce cours. J'ai apprécié la longueur, c'était facile de rester engagé. C'était très clair et concis. Originalement, je me suis inscrite, car je trouvais que je n'étais pas toujours douée pour les conflits et je sentais le besoin d'acquérir des ressources. Ce cours m'a permis d'en apprendra davantage (styles de conflits, dimensions cachées, stratégies pour désarmorcer les conflits, etc.). Ce sont des éléments que je peux appliquer dans ma vie de tous les jours. Je pense que ce cours va me permettre de mieux analyser les conflits et d'essayer, le plus possible, de mieux y répondre. [ English translation: I really liked this course. I enjoyed the length, it was easy to stay engaged. It was very clear and concise. I originally signed up because I found that I wasn't always good with conflict and I felt the need to acquire resources. This course allowed me to learn more (conflict styles, hidden dimensions, strategies for defusing conflicts, etc.). These are elements that I can apply in my everyday life. I think this course will allow me to better analyze conflicts and try, as much as possible, to respond better to them.] 


Jan 4, 2025